Things are good. At this very moment, things are good. Trying so very hard these days to live in the moment, not planning for next week or next fall, and it's getting a bit easier everyday I try to do it. Right now I'm burning a Beach Walk Yankee candle, waiting for my friend Jenny to arrive so we can make dinner, and listening to my German roommate Sandra sing German ballads in the kitchen.
Today started off positive, with a run. Meaning I RAN. Weird! I actually semi-enjoyed it! I then met up with my friends Courtney and Sari and went to this Opera Cafe that wasn't worth it but we roamed through La Boqueria and got some fruit smoothies. I then met up with Alejo y Elisabeth, my new private students!! Alejo is the splitting image of my friend Peter, though he's Argentinian and straight, and sometimes impossible to understand. They both want lessons, 2x/wk, and we're going to start on Monday. I'm so excited! They were wonderful, and every Argentinian I meet just makes me want to go to Buenos Aires even more, I love love love meeting people from that country, aside from their sometimes tricky accents. And they're almost always drop dead gorgeous, which doesn't hurt.
I then met up with Marta, a girl from Barcelona who is my new intercambio. We tried to find this elusive chocolate cafe to no avail and ended up getting fruit smoothies (My head hurts from all the sugar) and speaking in a mixture of english/spanish, and corrected each other though her English is practically flawless. She was super nice, and invited me to go to a beach in Costa Brava soon, which I definitely hope happens. I'm excited to have someone to help me with my language problems.
I also took a second last night and listened to my heart. I learned some really sad news about a dear friend of my family's yesterday, and as I sat grieving for the loss of this amazing person, I thought about how he lived his life, how I am living my life. I sat with myself and listened to what I want, and what decision would make me the most happy, in terms of deciding about grad school, a decision I've wrestled with for about 2 months now.
I also remembered a moment back when I was talking to my grandpa, when I was flirting with the idea of transferring from DePaul to a school in MA my freshman year of DePaul. I was applying to BC and my grandpa said "you know Shannon, you're going to go there. I can see it. I know it!" Well, I ended up getting rejected that time around, actually. But was accepted this time, and thought about that moment with Papa a lot yesterday. The answer is clear, it's always been. Boston College is where my heart is, even with the high tuition, annoying location and preppy kids, it's where I'm meant to be, to study international social work, and I think I've known that all along. I feel so elated and kind of in a daze about it, but mostly clear headed. Thank you to everyone who's listened to me deliberate between Simmons or BC for endless hours on end!
I don't mean to sound selfish, that someone's passing away made me make this seemingly insignificant choice, but to show what was going through my mind when I made the decision, and how some amazing people have led me and inspired me to listen to my heart and really go for it. For that, I am so very grateful.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Monday, May 24, 2010
Clothing optional
Feel free to give me a lecture. I slathered on sunscreen but apparently didn't get the memo to reapply it at the beach so now I'm basically my own personal space heater. HOT. My own fault. Oh, poor me, complaining that I went to the beach for the 3rd day in a row, I know I know.
Only today was a different sort of beach. Stumbled upon a beach lacking any tourists, people selling stuff that you don't want, and nicely set behind some sand dunes and near an incredibly clean beach. And sans beach wear! I went with a group of my fabulous female friends, and suffice it to say, felt incredibly european chilling on a nude beach in Barcelona. We didn't participate, at least not all the way. That's all I'll say on that topic, but it was an eye opening and interesting and hysterical day! I also have to go back to this beach at some point as the adorable man couple to my left played musicals all day long. Heaven!
Yesterday, after another few hours at the beach, we went bar hopping for my friend Jenny's 23rd birthday and it was considered a "tame" evening as we ended our bar hopping around 3 AM. That's probably one of my favourite things to do here- get a drink and then move on to another locale. Easy too, since you can just walk everywhere!
Tomorrow is a bank holiday or something so everything is closed. Which I didn't plan for. Looks like a fabulous lunch of boring spinach and lentils for the 4rth day in a row! Tomorrow though I'm meeting with the Best Buddies chapter of Barcelona to see about getting involved, I really hope it works out.
Alright, going to slather on more lotion and hit the hay. Adeu!
Only today was a different sort of beach. Stumbled upon a beach lacking any tourists, people selling stuff that you don't want, and nicely set behind some sand dunes and near an incredibly clean beach. And sans beach wear! I went with a group of my fabulous female friends, and suffice it to say, felt incredibly european chilling on a nude beach in Barcelona. We didn't participate, at least not all the way. That's all I'll say on that topic, but it was an eye opening and interesting and hysterical day! I also have to go back to this beach at some point as the adorable man couple to my left played musicals all day long. Heaven!
Yesterday, after another few hours at the beach, we went bar hopping for my friend Jenny's 23rd birthday and it was considered a "tame" evening as we ended our bar hopping around 3 AM. That's probably one of my favourite things to do here- get a drink and then move on to another locale. Easy too, since you can just walk everywhere!
Tomorrow is a bank holiday or something so everything is closed. Which I didn't plan for. Looks like a fabulous lunch of boring spinach and lentils for the 4rth day in a row! Tomorrow though I'm meeting with the Best Buddies chapter of Barcelona to see about getting involved, I really hope it works out.
Alright, going to slather on more lotion and hit the hay. Adeu!
Friday, May 21, 2010
Aquacervezabeerfanta? Massaje?
The aforementioned title is the plethora of people who seem to have a radar that goes off as soon as you step foot on the beach, trying to sell you any number of gross drinks, coconut, or the endless ladies tapping you on the shoulder to offer you a massage. No, gracias!
Yesterday was an interesting day- one of the only days that I can remember when I had nothing concrete I had to do. I felt both guilty and elated to have the day to myself for the first time in a while, so I grabbed my spanish grammar notebook and headed to the Ciutadella park to lay and read and study spanish. It was exactly what I needed. I was able to stop worrying so much about finding more jobs, my future, blah blah and just revel in the moment. Really lovely park- a huge fountain, some outdoor cafes and loads of little places under trees where people were lounging and reading. I also had my daily cafe cortado at a cafe, which is a little ritual I've started doing as it forces me to slow down a bit, and lets me check out random neighborhood cafes! Sari came over later and then we watched Glee and made dinner, lovely.
Today was another beautiful day, and still is as it's still kind of early. I went to the beach today with my friends Jenny and Sari and weren't bothered by beach vendors as much, only about 5x every 6 minutes or so. It was GORGEOUS. Tonight we're going to the Born area of Barcelona which is near the Gothic section and has all these hidden tapas places, really excited!
Also trying to narrow down my choices between Simmons and Boston College for grad school. The decision is slowly getting easier as there's a possibility of having a graduate assistantship with BC in the Latin American/Spain study abroad programs which would ROCK. I'm just sick of not knowing, but I know I'll figure it out sooner or later. The hard part is trying to do this all across an ocean but so far, it's going okay. Poco a poco!
Yesterday was an interesting day- one of the only days that I can remember when I had nothing concrete I had to do. I felt both guilty and elated to have the day to myself for the first time in a while, so I grabbed my spanish grammar notebook and headed to the Ciutadella park to lay and read and study spanish. It was exactly what I needed. I was able to stop worrying so much about finding more jobs, my future, blah blah and just revel in the moment. Really lovely park- a huge fountain, some outdoor cafes and loads of little places under trees where people were lounging and reading. I also had my daily cafe cortado at a cafe, which is a little ritual I've started doing as it forces me to slow down a bit, and lets me check out random neighborhood cafes! Sari came over later and then we watched Glee and made dinner, lovely.
Today was another beautiful day, and still is as it's still kind of early. I went to the beach today with my friends Jenny and Sari and weren't bothered by beach vendors as much, only about 5x every 6 minutes or so. It was GORGEOUS. Tonight we're going to the Born area of Barcelona which is near the Gothic section and has all these hidden tapas places, really excited!
Also trying to narrow down my choices between Simmons and Boston College for grad school. The decision is slowly getting easier as there's a possibility of having a graduate assistantship with BC in the Latin American/Spain study abroad programs which would ROCK. I'm just sick of not knowing, but I know I'll figure it out sooner or later. The hard part is trying to do this all across an ocean but so far, it's going okay. Poco a poco!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
I'll have an Estrella and patatas bravas, por favor. Again and again and again
Back to being solo in Barcelona, taking a bit of adjusting! Mack flew off on a jet plane this morning to Dublin and then Boston, bring back with him a new appreciation/obsession for patatas bravas, Estrella beer, and his suitcase stuffed with my winter jacket. After my exciting Thursday of quitting my job, we celebrated Thursday night by going to the Gracia neighborhood and having some beers with Sari in the cool bar that had old Casper cartoons on in the background. Strange.
Friday had be feeling extremely agitated for some reason and I couldn't quite place where it was coming from. Then I realized- I was having ridiculous wanderlust and needed to get out of Barcelona(why does this happen). Mack was game for an adventure so we packed a bag and headed to the train station and bought a ticket to the first destination heading to.. Tarragona!... yeah, me either. I had my trusty Lonely Planet Spain book which told us that Tarragona was a romanticish city an hour south of Barcelona on the coast and filled with random Roman ruins. Perfect! It was a slightly rainy day so climbing up the ridiculous hill once we got there wasn't the most fun, but then we had AMAZING pizza (hard to find decent pizza here, not that I'm biased or anything). We stumbled upon a slightly sketchy hostal about a frankfurt bar (?) and then roamed around the small city!
Some highlights: the huge food market that had lobsters so fresh, they were still moving!
-the german beer place called Bierwinkle with 90's American music playing and awesome beer
-the gorgeously old ruins scattered around the city that no one has touched and inside just incorporate it into buildings and such
-we found a cafe that served coffee with Bailey's that is socially acceptable to drink at all times of day and quickly became regulars. Even though we were there for less than 24 hours.
-really great overnight trip. Got to see another town with gorgeous views of the coast!
Saturday ( I apologize for the slightly boring day-day play, it helps me to remember all that we did!) we came back from Tarragona and immediately upon coming home, my roommates asked me if we were ready to go to the "going away bbq" for my roommate Marcelo who returned to Argentina on May 17th. Clearly this was something Marcelo had told me about but clearly there had been a translation problem on my end! We ended up going with my roommates to this wicked gorgeous rooftop deck in Gracia. My German roommate Sandra was wonderful and spoke English with Mack who was justifiably overwhelmed by all the rambling Catalan,Spanish, French and German being spoken! It was so much fun, even though it rained off and on all afternoon, but there were huge hunks of beef and endless bottles of wine, not to mention a really pretty view of the beach and Sagrada Familia in the distance. My head started hurting immensely from all the conversations, which I really loved as it meant I was switching back and forth a lot during the afternoon. It was also fun to hang out with my roommates, never have done that as a full group before!
After the barbeque we met up with my friend Lauren and found a kitchy 60's bar with fantastic cava and sangria, and then went to meet up with Sari and her mom who was visiting and Lauren's Catalan friend, Gregori. I really love random evenings! We hung out on this outdoor terrace at this nothing-special bar and Gregori started teaching me some Catalan which I soaked up, it's so beautiful, and just hung out. No discotecas for us, which I was kind of glad about.
Sunday was a lazy day in the morning so Mack and I went to my local bar for some cafes con leche and patatas bravas before checking out the Sagrada Familia and then going to meet up with everyone to watch the super important La Liga futbol game between Barca and some team beginning with a V (forgot, whoops). It was INSANE. Everyone was decked out in Barca scarves, Catalan flags and cheering like mad when Barca won, which meant they won the entire Spanish league championship, called La Liga! The entire city then streamed through the streets to the Placa Catalunya where there was live music, HORDES of people cheering, waving flags, and policemen everywhere with billy clubs?! Ridiculous! Mack got his finger cut and my toes were stomped on and the madness didn't die down until like 6 hours after the game, everyone was still honking and cheering and walking in the streets! So amazing to be here for that! And a football fan is born..
Monday Mack and I went to Parc Guell which was really lovely, especially in the parts high up where you get panoramic views of the city! We didn't stay long, just long enough to get a good feel for it, and beat it before it got really crowded. We got some paella and then went to the beach which was a bit windy but so great and relaxing. We ended the day with some tapas hopping in the Born area which is my new favourite discovery- never had been there before, and its chalk full of tiny little streets with hidden bars, plazas and we found some really cool places that had chorizo, manchego cheese, mini burgers and fantastic red wine!
Tuesday, aka "Touristy Tuesday" had us going up in the funicular to Montjuic- the mountain near Plaza Espana that has this old castle and THE best view of Barcelona. You can see all the way to Parc Guell, the coastline, all the mountains around Barcelona, its exquisite. We got blessed with some wonderful weather so after some patatas bravas and Estrella beer we went to La Rambla for some necessary shopping, got some gelato and after a brief rest we went back to the Gracia neighborhood for some drinks, then the beach which is so tranquil at night with only like 6 people around, and then went to a local place near my apartment for some last patatas bravas and Estrella (Mack might go through withdrawls)
So, it was a wonderful visit. Wonderful week. Adjusting today to making a new routine for myself, being alone and picked up a Catalan book to begin teaching myself. Good things!
Friday had be feeling extremely agitated for some reason and I couldn't quite place where it was coming from. Then I realized- I was having ridiculous wanderlust and needed to get out of Barcelona(why does this happen). Mack was game for an adventure so we packed a bag and headed to the train station and bought a ticket to the first destination heading to.. Tarragona!... yeah, me either. I had my trusty Lonely Planet Spain book which told us that Tarragona was a romanticish city an hour south of Barcelona on the coast and filled with random Roman ruins. Perfect! It was a slightly rainy day so climbing up the ridiculous hill once we got there wasn't the most fun, but then we had AMAZING pizza (hard to find decent pizza here, not that I'm biased or anything). We stumbled upon a slightly sketchy hostal about a frankfurt bar (?) and then roamed around the small city!
Some highlights: the huge food market that had lobsters so fresh, they were still moving!
-the german beer place called Bierwinkle with 90's American music playing and awesome beer
-the gorgeously old ruins scattered around the city that no one has touched and inside just incorporate it into buildings and such
-we found a cafe that served coffee with Bailey's that is socially acceptable to drink at all times of day and quickly became regulars. Even though we were there for less than 24 hours.
-really great overnight trip. Got to see another town with gorgeous views of the coast!
Saturday ( I apologize for the slightly boring day-day play, it helps me to remember all that we did!) we came back from Tarragona and immediately upon coming home, my roommates asked me if we were ready to go to the "going away bbq" for my roommate Marcelo who returned to Argentina on May 17th. Clearly this was something Marcelo had told me about but clearly there had been a translation problem on my end! We ended up going with my roommates to this wicked gorgeous rooftop deck in Gracia. My German roommate Sandra was wonderful and spoke English with Mack who was justifiably overwhelmed by all the rambling Catalan,Spanish, French and German being spoken! It was so much fun, even though it rained off and on all afternoon, but there were huge hunks of beef and endless bottles of wine, not to mention a really pretty view of the beach and Sagrada Familia in the distance. My head started hurting immensely from all the conversations, which I really loved as it meant I was switching back and forth a lot during the afternoon. It was also fun to hang out with my roommates, never have done that as a full group before!
After the barbeque we met up with my friend Lauren and found a kitchy 60's bar with fantastic cava and sangria, and then went to meet up with Sari and her mom who was visiting and Lauren's Catalan friend, Gregori. I really love random evenings! We hung out on this outdoor terrace at this nothing-special bar and Gregori started teaching me some Catalan which I soaked up, it's so beautiful, and just hung out. No discotecas for us, which I was kind of glad about.
Sunday was a lazy day in the morning so Mack and I went to my local bar for some cafes con leche and patatas bravas before checking out the Sagrada Familia and then going to meet up with everyone to watch the super important La Liga futbol game between Barca and some team beginning with a V (forgot, whoops). It was INSANE. Everyone was decked out in Barca scarves, Catalan flags and cheering like mad when Barca won, which meant they won the entire Spanish league championship, called La Liga! The entire city then streamed through the streets to the Placa Catalunya where there was live music, HORDES of people cheering, waving flags, and policemen everywhere with billy clubs?! Ridiculous! Mack got his finger cut and my toes were stomped on and the madness didn't die down until like 6 hours after the game, everyone was still honking and cheering and walking in the streets! So amazing to be here for that! And a football fan is born..
Monday Mack and I went to Parc Guell which was really lovely, especially in the parts high up where you get panoramic views of the city! We didn't stay long, just long enough to get a good feel for it, and beat it before it got really crowded. We got some paella and then went to the beach which was a bit windy but so great and relaxing. We ended the day with some tapas hopping in the Born area which is my new favourite discovery- never had been there before, and its chalk full of tiny little streets with hidden bars, plazas and we found some really cool places that had chorizo, manchego cheese, mini burgers and fantastic red wine!
Tuesday, aka "Touristy Tuesday" had us going up in the funicular to Montjuic- the mountain near Plaza Espana that has this old castle and THE best view of Barcelona. You can see all the way to Parc Guell, the coastline, all the mountains around Barcelona, its exquisite. We got blessed with some wonderful weather so after some patatas bravas and Estrella beer we went to La Rambla for some necessary shopping, got some gelato and after a brief rest we went back to the Gracia neighborhood for some drinks, then the beach which is so tranquil at night with only like 6 people around, and then went to a local place near my apartment for some last patatas bravas and Estrella (Mack might go through withdrawls)
So, it was a wonderful visit. Wonderful week. Adjusting today to making a new routine for myself, being alone and picked up a Catalan book to begin teaching myself. Good things!
Friday, May 14, 2010
Barcelona: Phase Two!
Haven't posted lately, didn't even realize! Might be due to the fact that I have a special visitor here and we've been busy meandering around the city and sampling all the croissants and cafe con leche that Barcelona has to offer. It's wonderful to have Mack here; he's met some of my friends, gone to the beach and we're speaking a mixture of Spanish/English to each other which I absolutely love. We still have loads of time to explore since he's here til Wednesday, I'm so glad!
A brief recap of my week:
Last Monday Mack finally arrived after being delayed in Boston Logan airport and then again in Dublin airport for 7 hours, but he made it! We celebrated his first night with some patatas bravas( spicy potatoes) and some Estrella Damm, the local beer of Barcelona.
Tuesday we walked through La Rambla and La Boqueria food market all the way to the beach where we met up with my friend Sari and her bf Mike and ate on the beach, and then I went kicking and screaming to teach my English class while Mack frolicked on the beach again. We met up with a bunch of my friends at this cute ladybug bar where they give you a free tapa for every beer you drink. LOVELY.
Wednesday was one of my rough scheduled teaching days where I only have a few hours in between classes so Mack and I took it easy and made lunch at home and after my stupid 5 year old class we went to go meet up at La Oveja Negra (Black Sheep) with Sherry and Mircad who sadly left Barcelona on Thursday for California and Macedonia, respectively. It was wonderful, they're such an amazing couple, and I was able to get their advice on how best to deal with/handle the very exciting news that I'll write about in just a minute! We ended up then going to Obama bar, which is this British Africa bar with live music every night and stayed out until around 1ish, I was glad Mack got to see a bit of the Barcelona nightlife lifestyle, and of course got very sad saying goodbye to Sherry and Mircad as its just another goodbye. Cannot believe all the hello's and goodbye's that happen here in the span of a week!
So my big news happened on Thursday, when I had a startling revelation on the metro ride to work. I turned to Mack and basically asked, "um, why am I going to a job I hate when that's one of the reasons I left Boston and my previous job in the first place?" Then my mind started whirling as I realized as much as I've been trying to have a different outlook on teaching, and view it as a challenge to overcome, it's not even part of why I moved to Barcelona (I mean I guess it is in a sense, as something to support myself, but I have other options). I don't see why I should be miserable, even if just for a few hours a week, when I hate the job, it pays terrible, it leaves me little time to do things here I had planned to (such as Catalan classes, work on my Spanish, experience this fabulous city), especially if I'm not here for that much longer and would prefer to make the most of it. I went into the academy and ran into the director and told her outright that I have to leave the job, and before I could get a word in edgewise, she became so ANGRY and said "that's 4 changes we've had in teachers for your classes", which isn't my problem obviously but she was taking it out on me, and said she was so angry that I bailed on my teaching committment, and stormed out of the room. Okay..
I had to go back later that day to teach my last class and felt a mixture of guilt and elation on the way there ;guilt at bailing on this job but also elation at quitting it and realizing I was doing what was best for me in the end, and opening myself up to new experiences, like privately teaching students, etc. The director, Eva, asked me to come and talk to her and then she was all nicey nice, asking if I couldn't wait another month, and when I said no, she got angry but tried to mask it like she cared about why I was quitting. (I had said I was leaving, and she thinks I'm leaving the US, which I didn't dispute and keep feeling guilty about lying) Eva said that I can't get paid unless I personally come in to pick up the money, that one of my friends can't come and do it for me even though I signed an authorization sheet. I understand they're trying to make it hard for me and punish me a bit for quitting and it just reinforces the idea that they really just want a body to teach these classes. One of the other teachers, as i was leaving said to me, "wow those classes must be ridiculous as you're the 4th teacher to leave in 2 months!"
I told Sherry about it, as we had been discussing how I would quit if I did, and she had these amazing words of wisdom, " I know it's human nature (for good, nice people) to put off taking care of themselves and doing what they perceive will hurt someone else. I know you can feel the relief now that it's done. My advice is to remember THAT feeling and not the nervousness, guilt and trepidation you were feeling before. Doing so should help you not put up with misery in the future!"
I completely agree. Of course I was up half the night feeling guilty, wondering if I had made a mistake, but in the long run I'm so glad I did it, and proud of myself since confrontation sometimes makes me feel like I have to pee my pants. Onto the next phase!!
A brief recap of my week:
Last Monday Mack finally arrived after being delayed in Boston Logan airport and then again in Dublin airport for 7 hours, but he made it! We celebrated his first night with some patatas bravas( spicy potatoes) and some Estrella Damm, the local beer of Barcelona.
Tuesday we walked through La Rambla and La Boqueria food market all the way to the beach where we met up with my friend Sari and her bf Mike and ate on the beach, and then I went kicking and screaming to teach my English class while Mack frolicked on the beach again. We met up with a bunch of my friends at this cute ladybug bar where they give you a free tapa for every beer you drink. LOVELY.
Wednesday was one of my rough scheduled teaching days where I only have a few hours in between classes so Mack and I took it easy and made lunch at home and after my stupid 5 year old class we went to go meet up at La Oveja Negra (Black Sheep) with Sherry and Mircad who sadly left Barcelona on Thursday for California and Macedonia, respectively. It was wonderful, they're such an amazing couple, and I was able to get their advice on how best to deal with/handle the very exciting news that I'll write about in just a minute! We ended up then going to Obama bar, which is this British Africa bar with live music every night and stayed out until around 1ish, I was glad Mack got to see a bit of the Barcelona nightlife lifestyle, and of course got very sad saying goodbye to Sherry and Mircad as its just another goodbye. Cannot believe all the hello's and goodbye's that happen here in the span of a week!
So my big news happened on Thursday, when I had a startling revelation on the metro ride to work. I turned to Mack and basically asked, "um, why am I going to a job I hate when that's one of the reasons I left Boston and my previous job in the first place?" Then my mind started whirling as I realized as much as I've been trying to have a different outlook on teaching, and view it as a challenge to overcome, it's not even part of why I moved to Barcelona (I mean I guess it is in a sense, as something to support myself, but I have other options). I don't see why I should be miserable, even if just for a few hours a week, when I hate the job, it pays terrible, it leaves me little time to do things here I had planned to (such as Catalan classes, work on my Spanish, experience this fabulous city), especially if I'm not here for that much longer and would prefer to make the most of it. I went into the academy and ran into the director and told her outright that I have to leave the job, and before I could get a word in edgewise, she became so ANGRY and said "that's 4 changes we've had in teachers for your classes", which isn't my problem obviously but she was taking it out on me, and said she was so angry that I bailed on my teaching committment, and stormed out of the room. Okay..
I had to go back later that day to teach my last class and felt a mixture of guilt and elation on the way there ;guilt at bailing on this job but also elation at quitting it and realizing I was doing what was best for me in the end, and opening myself up to new experiences, like privately teaching students, etc. The director, Eva, asked me to come and talk to her and then she was all nicey nice, asking if I couldn't wait another month, and when I said no, she got angry but tried to mask it like she cared about why I was quitting. (I had said I was leaving, and she thinks I'm leaving the US, which I didn't dispute and keep feeling guilty about lying) Eva said that I can't get paid unless I personally come in to pick up the money, that one of my friends can't come and do it for me even though I signed an authorization sheet. I understand they're trying to make it hard for me and punish me a bit for quitting and it just reinforces the idea that they really just want a body to teach these classes. One of the other teachers, as i was leaving said to me, "wow those classes must be ridiculous as you're the 4th teacher to leave in 2 months!"
I told Sherry about it, as we had been discussing how I would quit if I did, and she had these amazing words of wisdom, " I know it's human nature (for good, nice people) to put off taking care of themselves and doing what they perceive will hurt someone else. I know you can feel the relief now that it's done. My advice is to remember THAT feeling and not the nervousness, guilt and trepidation you were feeling before. Doing so should help you not put up with misery in the future!"
I completely agree. Of course I was up half the night feeling guilty, wondering if I had made a mistake, but in the long run I'm so glad I did it, and proud of myself since confrontation sometimes makes me feel like I have to pee my pants. Onto the next phase!!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Volcanic ash, take a hike
Oh Sundays. Sometimes I get the "Sunday Blues" because basically everything around my apartment is closed, and there's only bread shops open for food, so typically I try to plan something to keep me busy and try to combat some of the loneliness that for whatever reason creeps in on Sundays. Today is a gorgeous gorgeous day so I plan on meandering down the beach and reading and laying in the sun. Also attempting not to focus on the fact that some airports are closed/delayed due to the annoying volcanic ash situation- hoping they all stay open so Mack can arrive tomorrow morning!!
Went to Siges this past Friday- I spent my birthday there but this was an overnight trip and I got to thoroughly experience the nightlife! Slightly disapointed, as all the bars closed at 3 and there wasn't even a huge array of gay bars, mostly it seemed it was people from Barcelona come to get out of the city for the night. Maybe this is one of those places like Provincetown in Cape Cod that doesn't get happening until June, who knows! It was really nice to see my friend Lauren there and she and I ended up deciding (why, I have no idea) to just stay awake until 6 and grab the first train back to Barcelona instead of sleeping for a few hours. We ended up getting back at 7 AM, needless to say that even after like 5 hours of sleep I was a zombie all day. There was a Barca game last night vs. Sevilla and Barca won! I'm loving this part of living here- going to dive bars and watching Barca futbol games with all Catalans who scream at the TV and chain smoke until I feel like I've smoked an entire pack of cigarettes myself.
Thursday night I went to this ridiculous bar called "Bosc de les Fades"- Fairy Forest in Catalan. Well, the bar is literally a fairy wonderland- filled with trees, hanging laterns, a little waterfall and there's even a fake thunderstorm every hour. Really cheesy and really awesome! My friend Jenny and I had a glass of cava and pretended like we were out in the woods, lovely evening.
Better go occupy myself and enjoy this weather!
Went to Siges this past Friday- I spent my birthday there but this was an overnight trip and I got to thoroughly experience the nightlife! Slightly disapointed, as all the bars closed at 3 and there wasn't even a huge array of gay bars, mostly it seemed it was people from Barcelona come to get out of the city for the night. Maybe this is one of those places like Provincetown in Cape Cod that doesn't get happening until June, who knows! It was really nice to see my friend Lauren there and she and I ended up deciding (why, I have no idea) to just stay awake until 6 and grab the first train back to Barcelona instead of sleeping for a few hours. We ended up getting back at 7 AM, needless to say that even after like 5 hours of sleep I was a zombie all day. There was a Barca game last night vs. Sevilla and Barca won! I'm loving this part of living here- going to dive bars and watching Barca futbol games with all Catalans who scream at the TV and chain smoke until I feel like I've smoked an entire pack of cigarettes myself.
Thursday night I went to this ridiculous bar called "Bosc de les Fades"- Fairy Forest in Catalan. Well, the bar is literally a fairy wonderland- filled with trees, hanging laterns, a little waterfall and there's even a fake thunderstorm every hour. Really cheesy and really awesome! My friend Jenny and I had a glass of cava and pretended like we were out in the woods, lovely evening.
Better go occupy myself and enjoy this weather!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
The rain in spain does NOT fall mainly on the plains
It's a madhouse of rain in Barcelona- started Sunday night and is supposed to continue into Wednesday evening. This confirms what I already knew: I could never live in Seattle! I feel like everywhere all over the world is having freak weather lately, I heard Boston was 91 the other day? yikes!
Things are slowly getting better, as my sickness is pretty much gone and I successfully completed another Monday class with the 5 year old which miraculously, 3 didn't show up due to the rain so it was especially good and went by fast, thank goodness. I also had a lovely pedicure as a treat from Sherry, who is a fabulous woman from our TEFL program. My feet were pretty gross and it felt so great to be pampered for a bit. Sherry and her partner Mircad had Sari and I over on Sunday night for dinner, too- she made chicken tacos which blew my mind, and we even had chips and salsa (unheard of)! I love this pair- they're a middle aged couple who have lived all over the world and are now in Barcelona for a few months then planning on moving to Mexico to open a business together. Mircad is Macedonian and he is hysterical, I felt so welcomed into their home and NOTHING beats a homecooked meal.
Today I'm going to go check out a hatha yoga class and then teach my group of 9 year olds who I really like. My private student that I met over the weekend wants to meet on Thursday, so that's promising. A little bit each day, a little bit at a time, and I think I'll be alright.
Fun observation: I'm not joking when I say that if you ever ride the ridiculous amazing Barcelona metro (more on that later) you might be reading a book, or newspaper, and look up to find about 7 people starting at you very openly. Now, it doesn't mean you have something on your face or even that you look particularly attractive that day, they just STARE. I've been unable to get used to this as I typically choose to read something on the metro, having been taught that blatantly staring is rude.I know this is a cultural thing but I really can't get used to it, I try to stare back but get uncomfortable. I've felt tempted to use a Polaroid camera to take a picture of myself and hand it to people but I doubt they'd get the message, and film is expensive.
Barcelona metro= the best in the entire world, I'm convinced. Not only are there signs counting down the minutes AND seconds til it shows up, its usually clean, there's one every 3 minutes, and on each of the train cars, there's a lit up sign that shows which stop is next, AND a voice announcer telling you which is next. It's incredible and so fast, I love it!! Compared to the Madrid metro which lacks that and also chooses to list all the individual lines on every car so if you're not sure which line you're on, good luck to you!
Things are slowly getting better, as my sickness is pretty much gone and I successfully completed another Monday class with the 5 year old which miraculously, 3 didn't show up due to the rain so it was especially good and went by fast, thank goodness. I also had a lovely pedicure as a treat from Sherry, who is a fabulous woman from our TEFL program. My feet were pretty gross and it felt so great to be pampered for a bit. Sherry and her partner Mircad had Sari and I over on Sunday night for dinner, too- she made chicken tacos which blew my mind, and we even had chips and salsa (unheard of)! I love this pair- they're a middle aged couple who have lived all over the world and are now in Barcelona for a few months then planning on moving to Mexico to open a business together. Mircad is Macedonian and he is hysterical, I felt so welcomed into their home and NOTHING beats a homecooked meal.
Today I'm going to go check out a hatha yoga class and then teach my group of 9 year olds who I really like. My private student that I met over the weekend wants to meet on Thursday, so that's promising. A little bit each day, a little bit at a time, and I think I'll be alright.
Fun observation: I'm not joking when I say that if you ever ride the ridiculous amazing Barcelona metro (more on that later) you might be reading a book, or newspaper, and look up to find about 7 people starting at you very openly. Now, it doesn't mean you have something on your face or even that you look particularly attractive that day, they just STARE. I've been unable to get used to this as I typically choose to read something on the metro, having been taught that blatantly staring is rude.I know this is a cultural thing but I really can't get used to it, I try to stare back but get uncomfortable. I've felt tempted to use a Polaroid camera to take a picture of myself and hand it to people but I doubt they'd get the message, and film is expensive.
Barcelona metro= the best in the entire world, I'm convinced. Not only are there signs counting down the minutes AND seconds til it shows up, its usually clean, there's one every 3 minutes, and on each of the train cars, there's a lit up sign that shows which stop is next, AND a voice announcer telling you which is next. It's incredible and so fast, I love it!! Compared to the Madrid metro which lacks that and also chooses to list all the individual lines on every car so if you're not sure which line you're on, good luck to you!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
a wee bit of sickness
Stuck inside of my own volition on this really beautiful Saturday. Started feeling slightly ill on Thursday only to have progressed into a bonafide wicked head cold and who knows what else by this morning. Trying to do what I do worst and stay inside and make myself feel better, but it feels like sheer torture. I know I have a huge problem of staying in one place but staying inside all DAY?! absolutely not. Going out later on to meet a potential student for private classes, really hoping this works out.
I hate to sound like a complete Debbie Downer, but things have been rough lately, and I know they will get better soon, it's just been tough to handle. I got my first payment yesterday from my academy teaching job and got screwed over, pretty much royally. I wasn't told that the student I have for 1.5 hours a week, the private student, pays me less than my other classes. And when I broke down the math of how much I get per hour for that horrendous group of 8 5 year old boys, it equates to about 1.50 Euros/hr per student. Yeah.
So yes, I was really upset and felt completely taken advantage of. And I feel like I'm stuck at this academy until I find something else, so I applied to a bunch of people who want private classes so hopefully that pans out incredibly soon. I need to get out of this job, I deserve better, I know I do.
Ending on a positive note: Only 9 days until Mack comes to visit (!), found free Catalan classes that I'm hopefully going to start this week, and tonight is another Barca game that I'll be watching. Yay positivity!
I hate to sound like a complete Debbie Downer, but things have been rough lately, and I know they will get better soon, it's just been tough to handle. I got my first payment yesterday from my academy teaching job and got screwed over, pretty much royally. I wasn't told that the student I have for 1.5 hours a week, the private student, pays me less than my other classes. And when I broke down the math of how much I get per hour for that horrendous group of 8 5 year old boys, it equates to about 1.50 Euros/hr per student. Yeah.
So yes, I was really upset and felt completely taken advantage of. And I feel like I'm stuck at this academy until I find something else, so I applied to a bunch of people who want private classes so hopefully that pans out incredibly soon. I need to get out of this job, I deserve better, I know I do.
Ending on a positive note: Only 9 days until Mack comes to visit (!), found free Catalan classes that I'm hopefully going to start this week, and tonight is another Barca game that I'll be watching. Yay positivity!
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